One of the reasons I started this blog was to connect and build a community of women for and of all ages. We all have so much to learn from one another. I love spending time with my 17 year old daughter. I love hearing her thoughts and insight and vice versa. She gives me a bird’s eye view of what this generation faces; this includes the obstacles, the challenges, and the accomplishments. On the flip side, there are things that she does not understand about me and I do not understand about her. See, I have lived “it” while she is experiencing “it.” At times it’s as if Mama doesn’t have a clue what she is talking about. LOL…..My sentiments in that regard as when I was 17 I knew it all too.
The following blog was inspired by conversations I have had with my own 17 year old daughter and also former students of mine. Being in education for 18 years now I have had the privilege of watching these young ladies grow into young women. Often, there are mistakes along the way; I often reflected on decisions I made in my late teens and early 20’s. ( Oh my gosh….can I just say thank God for change, maturity, and growth?) These are the definite years that make a difference; mistakes will be made and lessons will be learned. I have learned so many things in my 42 years. With age, comes clarity, patience, and understanding. There is clarity from making mistakes you wish you hadn’t and experiences that will teach morals that last a lifetime! I am fortunate to have an audience of women and men that have contributed to this blog. I hope that the following comments are beneficial:
Tips As Stated By My Facebook Audience
- Red flags are there for a reason
- Do you and do not worry about a him. Know that whether you have a “him” or not, you must always take care of YOU first.
- Slow down and enjoy life! Don’t rush your life! Everything occurs in its own time. Focus on yourself & build yourself up young ladies!
- Trust your gut instinct and don’t talk yourself out of doing something that you desire to do! Shoot for the stars!
- Do not EVER quit pushing!
- You are perfect the way you are! Be you and not “them.” What you feel might be the end of the world today will have no relevance in a few years. Be cautious and wary of how you interact with others and also remember that cameras are always watching you!
- Be careful of what you put on Social Media—a good reputation is vital to your success!
- Be forgiving and patient with yourself; God has already charted your path and knows where you are headed.
- The opposite sex isn’t going anywhere…FOCUS on YOU including your goals and aspirations first.
- Don’t allow yourself to talk down to yourself.
- Don’t mold yourself to be what you think others want you to be. Make your own way the way YOU want to be. Fitting in isn’t always a happy situation.
- Do you with full fledged confidence! Do not worry about what others think of you.
- Know your worth and don’t accept anything less. Be unapologetically you, put yourself first, & ALWAYS choose you!!!
- Do NOT lose yourself for any man!
- If you STILL don’t know, then that’s your answer.
- NEVER EVER give up your dreams for a man. It doesn’t matter how in love you are. Reach for the stars!!!
- Never go alone anywhere, and never put yourself in a position you don’t know how to get out of.
- Don’t get pregnant early. Achieve your education goals, travel and focus on your career and life. Look at investing your money. Get a piece of mind& balance.
- But seek ye the kingdom of God, and his righteousness ; and all these things shall be added on to you. (Mat. 6:33). Many things, will come but your only constant needs to put God first, then all the things will align for good. (ROM. 8:28).
- Wait on becoming a mother. Do you first!!! Babies are good around 32-35; babies take a lot of care and concern. Make certain you are ready for that unselfish commitment.
- Listen to those that are older; being humble and having a wise ear never hurts. Listen and have some humility. Men and women could avoid a lot of pain if they would just have some humility and listen
- Do 👏🏽 Not 👏🏽 Create 👏🏽 a 👏🏽 Baby 👏🏽 Daddy! Avoid at all causes! Block, Educate, Pray and Protect your heart, mind, body, and soul! Learn to love yourself and understand men will hurt you, friends will hurt you, family will hurt you, this world will hurt you! Without Self Love YOU will hurt You! God made you the head and not the tail! He designed you to be great! You belong in this world and have a purpose despite adversity or what anyone has to say! Recognize the difference between God’s tests and the devil’s tricks.
- Pay no attention to the way the media and the advertising industry says you should look. Be confident in your unique beauty! Stay off all social media!
- Travel, live well, and enjoy life. There is so much more to this world than rushing into adult responsibilities!
Pulling it All Together
What I noticed when I polled my FB audience is that we have all learned from our own personal experiences. Now in our 30’s and 40’s our view points and perspectives are varied and different than when we were in our 20’s. That hot guy we wanted to date with the perfect physique transitioned to a hard working man that maintains a job and treats his woman with respect. The ambition of wanting to be seen and in the spot light is now a distant thought; many of us are appreciative of calm nights by the fireplace and watching Netflix. All in all, we also have the same theme of concentrating on the individual self first. Whether it be through education, taking the time to see the world, waiting to enter the task of parenting, saving money, or developing confidence so that one can stand on her own feet first, we all agree to put yourself first. At the end of it all, I would have to say that is SOUND and PERTINENT advice. When you put yourself first, you live for you, you set your goals, your aspirations, and you walk to the beat of your own tune!
I thank you for reading and hope that you will share these pieces of advice with the young women in your lives; also, I am grateful for my FB audience and their same passion for encouraging young ladies to be the best that they can be!