Detox Your Mind

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Romans 12:2 ” And do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

Hey Queens & Superwomen!

Have you ever thought it possible to cleanse or detox your mind? Think about it. Over the years, we absorb so much in our minds and brains! Many of these thoughts are that of negative connotation……many of these thoughts are that of positive connotation. When you think about it which thoughts are the ones that seem to ideally stick with you? Did you say the negative thoughts? For most of us this is the natural sequence of life; we concentrate on the negative things that have happened, the defeatist comments that have been told to us, and the pessimistic attitudes that have surrounded us from childhood to adulthood. Simply put, our minds absorb the worst and do not suppress the best. This is not something that we cannot change ourselves. We can change our minds!

My Personal Anecdote

I have always struggled with my appearance for as long as I can remember. When I was in middle school appearance became an obsession for me! I developed early. As a 6th grader, I wore a size 38DD bra and had already developed my Coca-Cola shape. I didn’t fit in. I “looked” different compared to my peers. I looked like a grown woman at age 11. It was hard to find friends because I did look so old at such a young age. I was constantly mistaken for a high schooler. Being so young and so developed, in my mind I felt like I had to “act grown,” “be grown” and do “grown up things.”

Appearance wise I felt like I had to look the part. I started to dye my hair, wore colored contacts, sneak to wear make-up, and I would sneak and change clothes at school as well. Yes, as stated this was all happening in middle school. Based on my home life I had even more skewed perceptions. My mother was a single mother working 2 full time jobs. I only was able to see her at 6 a.m. when she got me up for school. She did not get home most nights until after midnight after working at both Farmers Bank and EDS Data Processing Center. Most of my thoughts, notions, and advice was self advised or misconstrued from what I saw on TV or was told.

By the time I had reached 10th grade, I had began to depend on others for the opinion of myself. Negative connotations that stayed with me through adulthood included the following that I can recollect clearly:

” You are cute with a hair weave.”

” You would be pretty if your butt wasn’t so big.”

” There is no way you will be able to dance in the band; you are too thick!”

” If you was smaller you would be dateable.”

Again all of my preconceived thoughts and notions were based on appearance. From the age of 11 through my adult years my mind was consumed with negative thoughts about my appearance. My physical appearance hindered me as a productive person. I tended to hide my true self by creating someone that I felt others would physically accept. Even today this hurts as I type this blog. If my mind was not so consumed with these thoughts would I have made better decisions in life?

Because of this perception of myself, I made decisions based on what I believed about myself. I allowed men to treat me badly because I thought I wasn’t good enough or pretty enough. This included accepting both physical and verbal abuse. This included being used by people and not recognizing when people were not being genuine with me. I went through years of creating this persona based on comments that said, ” You are pretty if…you look good when….you should wear clothes that…” My brain needed to be detoxed and I needed to learn who I was. I needed to seek out Chemeka. As a result, I was not the nicest person either; in order not to continue to be hurt, I impaired my relationships with others that were close to me. I needed a complete and total detox of the mind. I needed to find out who I was and build a comprehensive woman based on that.

How to Start the Detox

In order to transform your mind you have to change your thoughts. The first step is to “think correctly.” One of the first things I did was to take a personality survey. The personality survey provided me with eye opening revelations such as my strong personality traits, my weak personality traits, and it also allowed me to observe my invididual thinking. In essence, the human brain determines happiness, effectiveness and interactiveness based on our individual traits. Therefore, the first thing I suggest for anyone that wants to engage in a brain detox is to take a personality assessment. Find out who you are and observe your thinking!

By changing your thoughts, you regulate your entire being. This includes heart rate, immunity, and blood pressure. Your life, health, and skill set is influenced by the power of your mind and the outlook you have of yourself. The following are steps and strategies recommended when beginning a mind detox.

Strategies

  1. Make a list of positive attributes. Keep them near and read them daily.
  2. Set goals that benefit your well being and your hopes and dreams!
  3. Do not allow anyone to get into your positive “mental space.” Do not allow anyone to tell you that you cannot do something or that you will not succeed!
  4. Tell yourself ” I can, I will, I do” daily as a positive affirmation.
  5. Focus on YOUR passion in life.

Techniques/Methods

  • Embrace all things positive- Transform those negative thoughts into positive ones. For example, if you fail at something view that as an opportunity to get better the next time.
  • Monitor your self talk – Optimism = Happiness = Success! Say something positive to yourself each and everyday!
  • Visualization – Fill yourself with positivity by looking at positive quotes for 5 minutes a day. Create a wall of positive mini thoughts, create a vision board.
  • Know Your Purpose – Life is too short to live it for someone else. Do not take your purpose for granted or allow anyone else to take your purpose from you. Be intentional in your purpose and practice getting better at it daily!
  • Know that you are limitless and your possibilities are infinite!

Your mind and your thoughts are in your control. Romans 12:2 states that, “We are transformed by the renewing of our minds.” No matter what you have been through, what negative things you have been told, and the experiences that you have had, you can detox your mind and be great. Your possibilities ladies are infinite!

References

Personality Survey

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

10 Ways to Detox Your Mind and Spirit

http://www.mindfulminutes.com

Detoxing your Mind

http://www.psychologytoday.com

Ways to Clean and Detox Your Mind

http://www.verywellmind.com

The New Testament Bible for Women’s App

Published by mrskelly20

Hello Queens and SuperWomen!! Welcome to my blog site! My name is Meka Kelly. I am excited you are here! Let me tell you a little bit about me and my WHY for this blog! I am a 40 something mother of 2, a full time public servant school teacher, and I also tutor as well. My passion is to teach children to gain a love for literacy! This is my calling and I have been in education now for over 2 decades! My WHY for this blog is this: * Women serve in multiple roles - mother, professional, spouse, aunt, sister, daughter, niece, supporter * Women take on a LOT and it becomes overwhelming * Women hold in a lot and do not take time to self care * Women are the pillars and the structure for their families; often we do not focus on ourselves Because of these factors, I have come to realize through my own experiences that we as women need outlets. Here is a place for alacrity, positivity, self-reflection, and healing! I hope this blog will be beneficial to my queens and superwomen! Meka Kelly

6 thoughts on “Detox Your Mind

  1. This breaks my heart. For you, for me, and for so many others who felt exactly like we did. I was too tall, too gangly, a tree, a haus, I had braces and glasses. “You’d be prettier with contacts“ “girl, you as tall as a tree”! No boys showed me positive attention except Andy, he was my sounding board. “Are my legs too long? Too skinny?” I literally wanted to have a surgery to cut out a few inches of bones to make myself shorter. It didn’t help that my “girlfriends” from elementary basically cliqued off to the cooler girls.

    Then in high school, I found that if I drank, it made me bolder, then I got a boyfriend who was totally wrong, but I finally felt validated. That relationship was SO toxic and at times abusive. Okay, most of it was abusive. That led me to drugs. Just an endless cycle of trying to fit in. Then there were other things done to me by my peers that scarred.

    I guess, we should have all just really talked!!

    I literally didn’t embrace my height until I was 25. I found I could help people and didn’t feel embarrassed but proud to get things from the top shelf!! 🤣

    Lastly, I grew up in the church. Was there every time the doors were open. During those transition years of being made fun of and finding that drinking was fun, I missed a few Wednesday night youth groups. When I did go back, the whispered comments were wrong.. The comments. I walked out and didn’t go back. BUT, through the next years of my life, I still prayed. I prayed before doing my first line of coke, I prayed during my first bad hit of LSD. I prayed. I never gave up on God, and He obviously didn’t give up on me. As I grew into adulthood, I got lazy with Him. Then, I found my way back to Him and the Church. I came full circle so to speak. Oh and I even told my pastor that I prayed before doing that line. I said, “Father God, please don’t let me get addicted!” And He didn’t. 🤷🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️😬 I can laugh about it now, but I was SO stupid. The things I did to feel included. To feel a sliver of self worth.

    Anyway. Thank you for sharing your story. I guess my detox happened about 7 years ago when I rededicated my life to Christ. I now have to catch myself when I see that I’ve gained weight or see that double chin peaking out. I have to remind myself when I see other woman in their 40’s on tv or even on FB that MY body was created in His image. He created me as He wanted and I’m perfect in His sight. (Yea, it’s easier said than done, but we’re all a work in process!!).

    Love you lady!!!

    Like

    1. To think I “ assumed “ your life was perfect!! Thank you so much for sharing with me!! You are an amazing wife and mother! I admire you and appreciate your support and thoughts!!

      Meka

      Like

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